[13 Feb 2003|05:35pm] bruiseology. remember? add me this is my final post. epitaph: Date created: 2001-04-21 12:42:06 Death Day: 2003-02-13 5:35 Journal entries: 795 Comments: Posted: 2,393 - Received: 3,490 just love me :[

[12 Feb 2003|05:24pm] i've moved to bruiseology. add me bitches, and i'll add you back. 23 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

So... [11 Feb 2003|07:21pm] I have a new journal. Thanks to Daniel. It's completed. bruiseology you love it. Jacob, will you be my date to prom? 2 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

i found these in my room [10 Feb 2003|06:16pm] you want me sooo baaaaaaaaaad. 4 days till jacob comes. i am so exciiiiiited. oh, and i need to buy batteries for my gigapet. Nicole and i are definitely making those cool again. oh. PS. You know the picture i posted of Michael Jackson with the 14 year old boy. you know the excancer one who spends the night at mj's house. Yeah, well, i guess the kids dad spoke out today about how he didnt know about these things and didnt know that his kid was spending the night at mj's house/ what a joke. Oh yeah, and michael jackson is trying to prove the journalist guy of a biased interview and that he only showed the bad things. whatever, michael. 31 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

starfish in the sea... [10 Feb 2003|07:25am] I'm sorry we've been so akward lately. I guess i just dont know how i feel. I mean, i know that i love you so much, but i just feel really shitty lately. i guess i just really miss you. a lot. i guess that i am just jealous of people. and this is one thoes situations. god, i feel so crazy. im sorry, call me when you get home today. please? 6 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

and those, they flash cards were really scary. [09 Feb 2003|01:22pm] Sometimes you dont know to say the right thing. moreso, the thing i (and i think all girls) would like to hear. yeah, i'd like to run away.but i dont want to stay here. i want to start fresh, but still with you. :::dont take this too seriously::: just love me :[

crazy. [08 Feb 2003|03:54pm] haha. uhm. i saw how to lose a guy in 10 days last night. super cute. i had to pee. nicole, call me when you get home from work. better yet, i'll call you. 5 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

If all the children in the world were to die, id jump off that balcony [06 Feb 2003|09:19pm] Man, Michael Jackson is such a screwball. he's seriously so insane. i dont think i've ever felt so uncomfortable watching anything on 20/20. He is just so weird. like, he has a fucking carnival in his backyard. he calls his son blanket. i just dont get this nonsense. My period isnt really here anymore. im confused. Jesus-please help me :) 14 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

girls gotta do it [06 Feb 2003|04:31pm] my period just halfway started. hooray. 5 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

go tell your friends im still a feminist. [05 Feb 2003|09:56pm] Does anyone have a livejournal code? i totally know one of you has one. please, i need a new journal. im so sick of this name. i've grown up and there is no need for me to be completely sad. okay? so i need a new name. please :):):) paid members get codes. i know some people who could definitely give me one. p.s. my stomach hurts. p.s.s. Happy Birthday Jessica.(hangupfast) ohyeah, i need to stop sneezing too. 7 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

remember [05 Feb 2003|11:02am] yesterday how excited i was that i get out of latenight early? no, i left at 10:30 and people were still there. Sharron hadnt even printed her pages yet. what the hell? why doesnt anyone regulate. maybe they do, and i just dont see it. whatever. i was in that room since 9 am. besides the little ditching karin and i did. but that wasnt for very long. i was complaining to brandon like i always do "BRRAAAANNNDDDON, WHY ISNT THIS WORKKKIIINNGG" mr. pfieff comes up behind me, no need to be fussy. EXCUSE ME. ive been here for 12 hours in this room working and you're telling me not to be fussy. man i was so pissed. then he took laser tag away LASER TAG! THATS THE ONLY THING I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO. he's all you could get expelled for this, except the janitor was cool with it? whatever. it's done, i dont care about it. i just want my stupid period to start its making me mad. and a little nervous at times. 2 more days of school left this week, hopefully it goes by fast. Oh yeah, yesterday when karin and i went back to her house to pick up pictures i felt so comfortable. it's really rare for me to feel okay in someone elses house. but for some reason in karins i just wanted to take off my shoes and feel everything with my feet. it just seemed really natural. plus she has the cutest cat ever. That was random, maybe sounds a little weird, but whatever. 2 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

my dad [04 Feb 2003|09:34am] is so cool. he called me out sick and let me come to school to work on photo all day. i definitely am excited. all day i get to work on photo shop and i will get done so early. i refuse to take pictures today. only photoshop. there are these insane labels on the computer. i love erica and her section, but no way dooes photo/art/ads all get the same computer. there is not way it'll work. so, jacob did you stay home? omg. sigur ros!! 3 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

i'm not a prostitue but i can give you what you want. [02 Feb 2003|06:14pm] I have realized i laugh entirely way too much. or maybe im just completely amazed at how stupid/funny people can be when they're drunk/high. but, laughing doesnt really mean youre happy. ms pac man is soo cool on a bigggg screen, nigga. 5 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

This is how I feel right now. 12:32 am. [02 Feb 2003|12:32am] basically this is my rant for january. i just need to scream. I dont understand a lot of whats happend this month. i dont get why my friends hardly talk to me. This is basically directed towards Simeon. I dont get why suddenly you act as if everything i do and say is stupid and that you need to cottle me and make me feel happy when all you're doing is making me feel plain dumb. I dont understand why i havent had a decent conversation with you in two weeks. why its so akward and why it just makes me feel unwanted when im anywhere near you. I dont like being known as a puppy that you can kick down to the ground and that you know i'll come sniviling back to you. you KNOW i will and i guess thats why you say it. because you know i really want to be your friend because i really like you, and i think you're a quality person. but i just dont like being expected to be there for you even if you're not being thoughtful. Please just remember i'm venting. i'm not really mad. i just need to get stuff off of my chest and you know i'm too nonconfrontational so i just can say i'm hurt directly to your face. I feel like lately i'm doing nothing but bringing you down. i know we've talked about this and you say i am not. but i dont want this to affect you. i dont want you to be hurt by something uncontrollable that should make you happy. i just fear so much that you're going to realize that this is too hard and hurt me. and hurt you. and i dont want you ever to hurt. i guess thats why this kills me so much. god, i love you so much. but i just get so confused and upset. this just making me hurt. making me ache. and making me sick to my stomach.

..... [01 Feb 2003|07:29pm] goddammit. im so bored. i hate that my mom wont let me go out. and that im not allowed to do anything. and that i cant see you. and my stomach hurts. and im hungry. and there is tension. and i dont have someone to run too. and i cant run away 1 yayahyahyah!!! :] just love me :[

so... [01 Feb 2003|01:02pm] My mom said she was going to take away my cell phone? she is so silly. last night was fun. i really enjoy nicole. tonight it total girls night. Dinner, How to loose a guy in 10 days and tons of period and sex talk. i'm definitely excited to be girly. oh yeah. i miss 13 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

all the things she said. [31 Jan 2003|10:34pm] Number of people on my lj friends list: 35 ...whom I've met in person: 24 ...whom I've met in person more than once: 22 ...who have been to my house: 12 ...whose precise geographic location I know offhand: 13 ...whose full names I know offhand: 30 ...whom I've followed/been in touch with for more than 3 years: 9 ...who live outside my country: 1 ...whose journal I consider myself "addicted" to: 2 ...whom I've lived with: 2 ...who's an ex: 0 ...who I'd do: 1 ...who I've done: 0? ...who I have a secret crush on: 0 ...who I have a not so secret crush on: 1 1 yayahyahyah!!! :] just love me :[

pack my bags and mount my horse. [30 Jan 2003|04:40pm] So, in sociology i have to do a research paper on subcultures. i have to be "photojournalist". excuse me. i already am. ha. So, this girl who is just disgusting and obnoixious, bettina, points at me during class "if we get to have partners, im definitely picking her" i'm glad to know she's "picking" me. So, what should i do this photo essay on. what subculture? Help me here. 9 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

Everyone takes deb(i)t. [30 Jan 2003|07:21am] Goddammit i hated last night so much. it was just so forced feeling. [[[edit]]] i am sorry. i just felt like last night wasnt right. everything just seemed unhappy. yeah, im sorry 2 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

OMFG [29 Jan 2003|11:02am] What's Your 90's Nickelodeon Show? brought to you by Quizilla HOW COOL IS THAT? 11 yayahyahyahs!!! :] just love me :[

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